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Ready or Not, Here They Come

HERE IN the Northeast, we've had a couple of blindingly sunny days around 60. My lawn has rediscovered the color green. The papers have replaced desultory Grapefruit League stories with examinations (Zolecki; Hagen) of whether the Phillies truly are ready to start the season.

Spring is here, baseball is back, and all is right with the world.

Until we get a couple of inches of April snow, the Phils lose seven of their first 10, and Tom Gordon tears a rotator cuff.

Philadelphia fans -- cynical? Us?

Eighth Isn't Enough

I CAN live with Ryan Madson setting up Tom Gordon. Madson is said to have been sharp this spring, replacing his too-hittable curveball with a cut fastball and returning to the fine form he showed as a rookie. Knowing his role heading into the season could help him be effective. So the eighth and ninth innings are seemingly taken care of -- but what of the seventh? And, this being the Phillies, the sixth? (They won't get any help from Rule 5 pick Jim Ed "Ricky Bobby" Warden, who was returned to the Indians yesterday.) Madson could be a terrific setup guy, but it won't matter if the relievers who take the hill in front of him cough up lead after lead. If the starters can stretch more this season than they have in years past, the Phils could be okay; if not, they'll continue to pile up frustrating, late-inning losses.

I May Have Strained My Triceps Just Typing This

TERRIFIC -- WITH less than a week to go before the games count, the Phillies are in midseason form in one important area. It is, of course, injuries. Two starters are on the shelf, two catchers are nicked, and one of the relievers has a bum hammie. And so we're looking at an Opening Day roster that includes the immortal pair of Clay Condrey and Jim Ed Warden, whom I'm going to call "Ricky Bobby," in the bullpen. Seriously, what is it about this team that leads to so many nagging injuries? Freddy Garcia loses a start or two here, Jon Lieber a start or two there, and before long the Reading Express starts showing up at Citizens Bank Park on a regular basis, leading to extended batting practice for the opposition. It happens year after year here -- as if the baseball gods don't even want to give us a chance to be competitive.

Wild, Wiki Stuff

OUR RANDOM stroll through Wikipedia takes us today to New Hampshire and a brief description of the East Branch of the Dead Diamond River. Just over 12.5 miles long, the tributary flows through the town of Pittsburg. Among its highlights, if, indeed, a 12.5-mile stream can be said to have highlights, are the photogenic Garfield Falls; point your camera either early or late in the day for the best shot.

Welcome to the Philadelphia InquirerNewsWeekly

ON THE heels of Michael Klein's revelation that Philadelphia Weekly is for sale comes today's scoop by Dan Gross that Philadelphia Media Holdings, owner of the Inquirer and Daily News, is reportedly a bidder. Everyone involved is no-commenting, which may be a sign that something is indeed up. It's bad enough that the city's two significant dailies are owned by the same company; throwing in an alternative weekly that does a fair amount of original reporting and, along with City Paper, provides much-needed differing viewpoints doesn't bode well of the quality of Philadelphia journalism and commentary. Didn't the city just get rid of corporate newspapering when Knight-Ridder took its ball and bat and went home?

Guess Who's Coming to Dinner

IN THE stories (Inky; DN) announcing Brett Myers's selection as the Phillies' Opening Day starter, it was revealed that Charlie Manuel visited Myers's home in the off-season. The Phils' manager wasn't paying a social call. Instead, he told his wannabe ace to get his shit together, come to spring training in shape, and start fulfilling some of that long-discussed potential. Myers's reaction:

"It was a good talk. It's good to be able to talk to your manager that way. That's what's cool about Charlie. You can talk to Charlie anytime, anywhere. You can tell him to go [climb a tree], but the next day he's cool with it. 'OK, you had a bad day yesterday; let's talk about it today.' He's cool that way."

The Numbers Game

IN 10 seasons at the University of Kentucky, Tubby Smith compiled a very impressive 263-83 record and won a national championship. And yet Smith just bolted Lexington for Minnesota, where, presumably, a .760 winning percentage is something to be proud, not ashamed, of.

In two seasons with the Phillies, Jon Lieber has gone 26-24, with a 4.52 earned run average. And yet Lieber thinks this thoroughly mediocre tenure entitles him to tell his bosses how he should be used.

Odd world, sports.

Wild, Wiki Stuff

HOW APPROPRIATE that as we swing into the Sweet 16, today's random Wikipedia article is on Memorial Gym, home of the Grambling State Tigers basketball program. Memorial seats 2,200, which one describes charitably as "cozy." Should the SWAC ever play its tournament championship game there, whatever C-level team ESPN sends to Louisiana to cover the game for the Deuce will marvel at the great "atmosphere" of the arena, all the while hoping they don't get trampled by stampeding fans rushing to center court should the Tigers win.

Downgraded

UP UNTIL yesterday, "cautious optimism" was how I pegged my view of the season to come. You know -- the addition of Freddy Garcia, Adam Eaton, and Wes Helms, the continuing development of Ryan Howard and Chase Utley, etc. All reasons to look ahead with bright eyes and hope. But then I took a look at Bill Conlin's "Not so fast" piece in yesterday's Daily News. And Todd Zolecki's indictment of the Phillies' bullpen in yesterday's Inquirer. And Paul Hagen's exploration of the Phils' poor spring in today's DN. And now I'm getting that first whiff of another putrid April. Charlie Manuel, rightly, is concerned, according to Hagen's story, but the players are offering the usual platitudes about games that don't matter. Eaton told Hagen, "You don't want to say you can just flip the switch on, but we're not really getting paid for this," which is 100-percent wrong. He and his teammates are getting paid to play at their best, and part of that involves what happens from the end of September to the beginning of April: Keeping themselves in shape, for example, and being as prepared as possible to win from the first pitch of Opening Day on. When you consider how poor starts have sabotaged the Phillies in several recent seasons, a hot April becomes even more necessary. And so "cautious optimism" has given way to "wait and see."

Bracket Bluster

DESPITE COPY-EDITING this year's ESPN.com NCAA Tournament guide, I never got around to getting into a pool this March. What that means is that I can watch the games with some purity, pulling like mad for underdogs without having to worry that upsets will destroy my bracket. And so Duke's defeat last night and Notre Dame's this afternoon had me smiling at the downfall, however temporary, of a couple of smug, self-satisfied programs. I can pray that Reggie Theus's New Mexico State Aggies continue to give Texas all it can handle, as they are late in the first half as I type this. And I can delight that surely every big-conference stumble causes Billy Packer's gut to clench just a little bit tighter.