Shallow | Center

Wait, Haven't We Done This Before?

WXPN's Latest Countdown Has a Too-Familiar Feel to It

Countdowns and lists are great parlor games, and WXPN, Philadelphia's unparalleled noncommercial music station, has been having an awful lot of fun with them over the last few years. This year's initiative, though, is lacking. The station's countdown of the 885 Most Memorable Musical Moments feels slapped together and lame, as if, when planning what to do earlier this year, the staff and DJs sat around quietly stirring their coffee until someone timidly suggested "most memorable musical moments," and because ideas were few and far between, no one said, "Well, how does that differ from what we've already counted down?"

For example, moment No. 78 was Bob Dylan's release of Highway 61 Revisited. Well, Dylan was recognized as No. 2 on the previous list of the 885 All Time Greatest Artists. The record itself was No. 16 on the list of the 885 All Time Greatest Albums. And the album's songs "Like a Rolling Stone" (No. 3), "Just Like Tom Thumb's Blues" (No. 92), and "Desolation Row" (No. 252) all made the list of the 885 All Time Greatest Songs. Not only that, but 'XPN played "Like a Rolling Stone" to commemorate Musical Moment No. 323, the opening of the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame.

I'm all for recycling, but I'm hoping the station comes up with something more original next year. They're simply slogging through this year's list -- it's not engaging at all, and, unlike past years, I have no sense of anticipation or suspense over what the top of the list will reveal. Put on some more coffee, guys, and get to work.

Way to Go, Guys

 BY SUSPENDING Don Imus for two weeks, CBS and NBC have sent a clear message.

That message is: Racism is fine as long as no one complains about it.

Imus's Klan-like screed about Rutgers's women's basketball team, broadcast nationally last week, would have gotten a lesser-rated jock an immediate pink slip. Imus, though, draws listeners and viewers, and so it was only well after the public condemnation rolled in that his bosses acted. In waiting so long, they gave the impression that they are concerned not that their employee polluted the airwaves with racist drivel, but that that they might lose revenue because of it.

Which makes CBS and NBC as culpable as Imus, especially considering that this isn't the first time that his on-air commentary crossed the line that separates offensive from unacceptable.

Dude, I Already Pledged Allegiance -- and Funding

HOW IS it that the two radio stations I listen to most when I'm in the car are having simultaneous fund drives? The Preston & Steve Show notwithstanding, WHYY and WXPN are the sole stations in the region that I can tune to and leave on, guaranteed, for more than five minutes at a time. No other stations are so consistent in offering interesting and different content in such long blocs. But, geez, when they go into pledge mode, the intriguing stuff gets locked in a closet and replaced by wave after wave of self-righteous staffers smugly informing me of how much better my life is thanks to their stations' presence. Which is probably true. But I'm already a member of 'XPN, as Mrs. Shallow Center is of 'HYY. We've drunk the Kool-Aid, thank you very much, and we'd rather not have it forcibly poured down our throats again. Especially when it's accompanied by such strident, shrill raving masquerading as please for funding.

Stern of the Crew

Howard Tunes Out, Takes Off

TODAY IS THE FIRST DAY of the rest of Howard Stern's life. Howard, as you may have heard, broadcast his final show on so-called terrestrial radio Friday; in January he'll begin a five-year, half-billion-dollar contract with the satellite radio service Sirius. Because this was such a watershed cultural moment, he spent the last couple of weeks running off at the mouth to anyone holding a microphone or tape recorder; I especially enjoyed the insightful interview with Knitting World. Regardless, Stern has rather enjoyed spending the last couple of decades as a martyr, I suspect, and he's often been his own worst enemy, baiting the cultural conservatives and the FCC and then objecting incredulously when the bait was taken.

T-Met

Good Guy Tom McCarthy Joins Billy Wagner at Shea

IF THE METS WANT to gamble more than $40 million of their hard-earned revenue on Billy Wagner's lasting enough seasons to justify that kind of scratch, that's their business. Far more vexing on a personal level is New York's theft of Tom McCarthy from the Phillies' radio booth. T-Mac goes from being the lowest man on the WPHT totem pole to the No. 2 guy at the mighty WFAN/660-AM. It's a clear promotion for a great radio voice, a hell of a baseball mind, and a jovial, winning personality.

Radio Daze

'XPN's Greatest-Albums Playback: The World's Strangest-Ever Mix Tape

WXPN is meandering its way through a massive undertaking, playing back songs from the 885 greatest albums of all time, as voted on by its listeners. 'XPN has always prided itself on the diversity of its playlists; indeed, during pledge drives they put the diversity in front of a microphone and have it ask listeners who their daddy is. They've really outdone themselves, though, by polling us masses on our faves. Over the last week or so, I've heard, mixed in with such typical 88.5 fare as Indigo Girls and Patty Griffin, the likes of Public Enemy, Interpol, Metallica, Frank Sinatra, Rush, and, I swear to God, Black Sabbath.

It's an interesting little diversion, designed to spark discussion, I'm sure, as these lists usually are. The obvious move here would be to post my own top-10 list, but as much as I love listening to music, my CD collection is shamefully lacking in many records universally acknowledged as must-haves. I don't own Pet Sounds, or the White Album, or London Calling, or Exile on Main Street. I don’t even own Exile in Guyville.

I will now duck while you throw your old 8-tracks at my head.

When you're done doing that, feel free to share your picks in the comments section below.

The Talk of the Town

'PEN to Switch Format, Take on 'IP

The news from this morning's papers (Inquirer; Daily News) that WPEN/950-AM will switch from its oldies format to sports talk in early October is an interesting one. 'PEN will be taking on WIP, which from a purely sports perspective seems ripe for the picking. What 610 does it does well, but its overreliance on frat-boy hijinks and a handful of hosts who are more interested in berating listeners than engaging them in conversation leaves the hard-core sports fan stuck trying to pull in New York's WFAN or Trenton's 920-AM. 950 will not be an ESPN Radio affiliate, which means that 920 is still the only place locally to find the Worldwide Leader. Thus far the only announced on-air talent is 'IP expat Jody McDonald and, sigh, Jim Rome, whose big claim to fame is calling former Rams quarterback Jim Everett "Chris Evert" on a TV show a while back, eliciting a predictably violent reaction. If this is the kind of dialogue we can expect from the new station, the folks at 610 are probably safe.

'Mix' Up; 'Ben' In

Another day, another radio-station format change. Yesterday the bland, inoffensive, top 40 station Mix 95.7 gave way to Ben-FM, which thus far has delivered a scattered, all-over-the-place playlist that's a bit, well, jarring. We're talking Guns 'n' Roses and Rick James back-to-back. Then Jewel followed by Hall and Oates. Then ... well, you get the idea. The thing is, the everything-but-the-kitchen-sink approach, as scattered as it may seem, is by design. Referring to the new station's "anything-goes format," the Inquirer's Michael Klein writes:

"We have the freedom to play anything we want," said John Fullam, v.p. and market manager of station owner Greater Media. ...

Ben is similar to the growing "Jack" and "Bob" formats, which use an expansive song list.

Ben promises familiar songs spanning 30 years by artists as diverse as No Doubt, Men at Work, Jimmy Buffett, Boston and the Bee Gees.

Uh, the "'Bob' format"?

Why Ask Y?

Philadelphia's best morning radio show -- I know what you're thinking, and believe me, in this case I'm not damning with faint praise; these guys are good -- is on the move. Preston Elliot and Steve Morrison were to have aired their final show on Y-100 tomorrow, then take six months off, as mandated by their contract, before resurfacing on WMMR later this summer. The Inquirer's Michael Klein reports today, though, that Y-100 dumped its DJs at noon today in anticipation of a format change. Preston and Steve apparently won't get to do that last show, and Y-100 soon will switch from its usually tiresome modern rock format to that of sister station 103.9, whose urban sound is equally unappealing to me. I can't say I'll miss nonstop Good Charlotte and Limp Bizkit, but replacing them with Snoop Dogg, Usher, and P. Diddy is hardly my idea of a good listen.

No matter. The bigger loss is that of Preston and Steve for half a year. They say they'll keep us up to date during their hiatus, but that's not going to help my morning commute between now and September. Steve's Michael Jackson riffing brings tears to the eyes, and with Jacko's kiddie molestation trial about to start, that's an awful lot of radio gold that, sadly, isn't going to happen. Hurry back soon, guys.

A Tune-Up for the Phillies

Both papers report today (Inquirer; Daily News) that the Phillies will slide up the radio dial to WPHT/1210-AM for the next few seasons. WIP/610-AM will carry games on Friday nights, which 'PHT reserves for its well-known Sinatra program Fridays with Frank. The move makes a ton of sense, as former outlet WPEN/950-AM was a tough listen whose weak nighttime signal wobbled in and out of reception, especially if you were in a moving car.

The only downside I can envision is having to hear more promos for the new stations' respective talk-radio programming. The combination of Sean Hannity, Howard Eskin, Dom Giordano, and Angelo Cataldi, after all, is playing on hell's transistor radio. Listening to the "Big Talker" and "Philly SportsRadio" boast about their respective lineups of gasbags and juvenile delinquents won't do much for my mood while Chris Wheeler is trying desperately to put a shiny red bow on another Phillies waxing by the Braves on some suffocating August night.